Y'all Don't Understand Life

on·o·mat·o·poe·ia

ˌänəˌmatəˈpēə,-ˌmätə-/

noun

the formation of a word from a sound associated with what is named (e.g., cuckoo, sizzle ).

I love this lesson. I love it because it reminds me how creative and fun my students can be at the ripe age of 12 and 13. It reminds me that, despite all that media and peer pressure that seems to force them to grow up faster than we did at this age, they are still kids; and I love it.

 

I stood at the front of the room, making sure I had plenty of space, in order to ask the kids if they knew about such cartoons as "DUNNA NUNNA NUNNA NUNNA DUNNA NUNNA NUNNA NUNNA, BATMAAAAN! POW! BANG! BOOM! (insert air punches here)!" I got a lot of "what the heck?" looks from the kids, but I was not phased by this as I get it on a daily basis because I frequently make a fool of myself...for their benefit. Ask any child in my classroom if they know how to spell the word onomatopoeia. Guaranteed you'll get a "yes!" because of my teaching strategies. You're welcome, kids. You're welcome, world.

 

I gave them a list of nouns such as bacon, rattlesnake, rain, and a baby crying; they had to come up with an onomatopoeia for each sound. When we reached the word rain, we talked about how there are different types of rain, so obviously there are different sounds we could record on paper. One of the choices was shhhhhh. Here is the  student "conversation" that followed that response:

 

S1: Shhhh, ooh... it's like a mountain.

S2: How is it like a mountain???

S1: (attempting to explain)

S2: No, it's not! (whole class agrees by adding their own comments)

S1: Whatever, y'all don't understand LIFE!

 

These are the types of things being debated in 7th grade classrooms today.

WHAT'S the Conflict??

Honestly, there isn't a story to preface this photo. His answer for "conflict" didn't make any sense to me either. There is NO explanation for what you're about to see. Listen, I understand, at times, these may truly be a conflict for people in life, it just wasn't a conflict in the story he was reading. I don't know what else this word could be...

Punishments

I have a particularly special class for my last period of the day. They are FULL of personality &, at times, it's difficult to concentrate on academics because of distractions around the classroom. That's the nice way of saying it. ;)

I implemented a new "Bingo" system with this class that allowed each student the opportunity to earn stickers on their Bingo boards. If they had a full row by the end of the week, they were allowed to join the other "full row" students for some free time outside for the last 15 minutes of class on Friday. This has been working out very well for this class.

Before we decided on this "Bingo" idea, I wanted to get the students' feedback on what they thought might be going wrong in the classroom & what some solutions might be to create a more productive learning environment. After some interesting suggestions, I quickly realized there are some kids who LOVE to think of punishments. One student couldn't stop suggesting different punishments, which entailed embarrassing/humiliating students infront of the class (to teach them a lesson). One student who sits quietly under the radar most days in class, rolled his eyes & responded under his breath, "Man, he's on fire..."

Another student, after much thought, muttered loud enough for the people around him (& me, thank goodness) to hear him say, "You should just give us spankings." A friend of his next to him said, "SPANKINGS??" The student looked up & squealed, "Spankings. You don't get spankings?!" Ahh yes, folks. These are the children of our future... I love them & their way of thinking...

Inconveniently Late in the Year

Well, I'm disappointed to report that it's been more than a year since I've written my last post.

Last summer, I felt like God was encouraging me to make a move to another school, so it was bittersweet when I applied for a new job as an ELA teacher & was offered a position at Gorzycki Middle School, leaving my Kealing kids in 78702. The good news is, my Kealing kids still email me, so I still feel connected, & they are doing so well! Gorzycki has been such a positive change for me. I feel I have learned so much from my coteachers & admin about classroom management, teaching style, & expectations for student-centered learning. I have also learned so much from my 7th graders here at Gorzycki too.

Unfortunately, I haven't been dedicated to recording the ridiculous things they've said or done, & therefore have missed out on posting the classic stories on this blog. Knowing this, I want to make sure it doesn't continue very much longer. I have made a promise to myself to begin collecting the quotes, events, & stories about my awkward little teens on a weekly basis so I will be able to post these memories from my first few years at Gorzycki.

Here's to the witty nuggets that have made my first year at Gorzycki an unforgettable experience!

Valentine's Day

My students are amazing! On Valentine's Day I received a few really special gifts.
What would Valentine's Day be without a snuggly bear with 2 Fruit Rollups? Or a series of "I (heart) U" chocolate bars with a Sponge Bob Squarepants theme? ;)


















Not only are her complete sentences perfect, but she made this pen for me. You can't see it well, but she enscribed "Ms. Schwarzlose" in the design. It is so cute!!





2/16/12:
And last, but certainly not least, I was given a card first thing this morning from one of my 1st year students. I love the little details about this card. The heart on the right says, "Happy one (crossed out) TWO day after Valentine day."

Would You Rather...?

Every day for the past few weeks I have created a "Would you rather...?" question for my students to answer in their journals. It has been fun to hear their responses! Yesterday & today I had the students create their own "Would you rather...?" questions & I was not disappointed with what they came up with. Here are a few examples...

1. Would you rather live inside a whale with two people you hate or live in an open forest all by yourself?


2. Would you rather cut your hair & have to eat it or cut your nails & have to eat them?


3. Would you rather live in Antarctica or the Sahara Desert for one year?


4. Would you rather live in house taken over by roaches or spiders?


5. Would you rather live with the President of the United States of America in the White House or live with your favorite movie star?


6. Would you rather eat an animal raw in the desert because you are starving or eat the lunchroom food that is soooo bad?


7. Would you rather kiss a monkey or eat dog food?


8. Would you rather be homeschooled & have a prom or go to a regular school & not have a prom?

I answered "spiders" to #4 (asked by a Japanese student) & she said, "Even though spiders can hurt you (as she was pinching her own arm)??!!" I said, "Yes, because roaches are so dirty!!"

That's when her twin brother said, "Ms. Schwarzlose, would you rather live in a house taken over by roaches or CATS?" I answered "roaches" because at least I could still breath for that year!!

A Special Meal

I assigned a writing prompt at the beginning of class:
If you were making a special meal for someone, what would you cook & why?

In my 3rd period class, all the students are Mexican, so naturally, they all start talking about their favorite Mexican food dishes.

To challenge them, I said, "What if you were to do something that wasn't Mexican?"

One student immediately responded, "OOOKAAAY, I would throw up (short pause)...because I'm not used to it."

Far From Home

My heart broke yesterday when one of my students came to me after school.

She asked me earlier in the day if I'd be here after school because she wanted to talk to me. CC is a beginner English speaker who came to the U.S. a few years ago for about a year, then returned to Mexico. She came back in August 2011 & it has been so fun to teach her & get to know her. She is somewhat quiet if she doesn't know you & has the sweetest nature about her.

She came into my room right after school & said, "Miss, I can't stay today, will you be here tomorrow?" I told her yes, but then I asked her what she needed to talk about. She hesitated & didn't want to start the conversation. I kept asking & told her just to tell me what it was about & that we would talk more about it later.

Finally, after a minute or so of fidgeting & thinking (I'm sure trying to translate the words in her head, mixed with "I don't know if I want to start this now..."), her eyes filled up with tears & she said, "I miss my mom."

I opened my arms immediately & held her, telling her I was so sorry. I didn't know what to say. It sucks. I actually have 3 girls from Mexico who live with extended family in Austin because their parents are back in Mexico.

I understand these parents are sending their kids to live here to get a good education, but it is so hard to be that far from your parents & siblings for this long. They get to see them at Christmas during the school year & that's it! By law, we must educate these children & I'm so thankful that I have this job. I know I have the best job on campus, getting to work with these incredible students. I hear them talk about their schools in Mexico & I know they are getting a good education there. So, sometimes I ask myself if sending them to the US by themselves is really "better" for them.

Stomach Talk

After lunch, my stomach was digesting (I guess) & it made a noise. I said to my two girls, "Oh, I think my stomach is talking to y'all after lunch."

Angelica (started learning English last year) quickly replied, "I think mine is responding to yours."

CSI: Kealing

I wanted to introduce a learning strategy to my students that will help them "find clues" in what they're reading to help them better answer the questions about the text. It's called the Inference Strategy. I was determined to make this strategy fun!

I set up a crime scene (with random pieces of evidence) & the kids walked in & said, "Whoa! What? What happened?" I looked at them with the same surprised face & said, "Oh no! I don't know...I guess that's YOUR job. I mean, obviously the victim's dead, but you have to figure out HOW he died, based on what you know."

They LOVED it! With journals in hand, they went & knelt down by the scene to study all the evidence & see what they could come up with. I was excited to see them get into it & the excitement transferred over when they expressed joy about being investigators while they read passages. This is the moment I've been waiting for!! To have my students excited about READING! Ha! Who knew I had to set up a fake crime scene to help that happen.

The second day I presented this was really funny. I began the class with some Intense Music for the students to listen to as they studied the crime scene. (I literally googled "Intense Music" as I that's exactly what I got.) They felt like they were in a movie. ;)

What Do YOU Want For Christmas?

I asked one of my classes a simple question. "What did you ask Santa for this year?" The responses were genuine & made me smile...

EG is not famous for his sweet nature (because he is normally talking, day-dreaming, or making excuses for himself), but his response melted my heart.

What did I ask Santa for this year? I asked Santa for good time with my family so we can laugh & spend time together.

MC is not known for her selflessness (because she has been displaying a "I'm gonna do what I want & I dare you to try to stop me" mentality lately), so her response caught me off guard.

I'm not asking Santa for nothing! I mean, anything. I'm too old for presents. Uh uh, no no. I don't need all that. We just gonna haaang out & be a crazy family.

I was so surprised, as most of the students at our school have a very thick sense of entitlement that isn't even valid. It was refreshing & wonderful to hear them talk about the holidays.

She's Getting Bossy...And I Like It.

One of my newcomers last year, Angelica, has undoubtedly been one of the biggest joys in my life in the past 1.5 years. She is so hard-working, self-motivated, & is a very kind person. She has learned English so quickly & jumped so many proficiency levels in one year, it's simply shocking.

I would like to brag on her for a moment (as if I haven't already). She says she wants to be a teacher when she grows up. Well, I've got news for everyone... She's already acting like one in my classroom, and I like it.

Either we share a brain, or she has an uncanny ability to know exactly what I'm thinking, OR all teachers think alike. Which means she's chosen the perfect profession for herself. This girl is becoming more & more vocal as the days go by & her peers are getting used to her (borderline) scolding them, (constructively) correcting them, & asking them questions to check themselves. Sometimes, I feel like I should give her part of my salary. It only seems fair.

Last week, the students took a spelling test & we did a peer check afterwards. Angelica asked me to come over & recheck one of Erik's words because she couldn't read it (ie, his handwriting wasn't his best performance.) As I reviewed the word, Erik became defensive & said, "What?! I write small, ok?! It's right, the word is right, I just write small." Angelica & I both looked at him & as I opened my mouth to respond, this little girl ever-so-slightly raised her voice & said,"Then, you need to write big." Literally, took the words right out of my mouth.

Again, it's simply a joy.

"I Break My Brain"

One of the best things about learning another language is hearing the outcome of of a student translating an expression that is unique to that culture. For example, Coraima, one of my Spanish-speaking students, has screamed out "I'm breaking my brain..." on a couple of different occassions, usually after she's been thinking a lot & working very hard. ;) (The equivalent for us would be, "I'm racking my brain.")

Recently, Coraima had been working hard & another girl in the class looked at her paper, scooted closer to her, & began copying down a response. Coraima slams her fist on the table & bursts out, "Meees! Ugh! I break my brain & then she copies me! It's no right!" It was pretty awesome.

The expression in Spanish is "Me estoy rompiendo mi coco," meaning, "I'm breaking my coconut." I give her credit for changing the word coconut to brain.

A Gentleman & A Lady

2 years ago, an unplanned brainstorm session (about the characteristics of a "gentleman" & a "lady") occurred in one of my classes & I really enjoyed hearing their thoughts. Yesterday, I decided to ask my advisory to think about this same topic for 24 hours & report back to me. This morning, their assignment was to create a T-Chart to outline those qualities. (Below, I have written exactly what was on the poster...)

GENTLEMAN
have good manners.
wears glasses.
Men.
strong :)
nice to ladys.
he is doing jobs.

LADY
wears a dress.
Have a long hair.
women.
wears earings.
she respect other people.
She is sensetive.*

*Sensetive is all they could come up with because the literal translation of the Spanish word they kept saying was "weak" & there was a big argument about how that wasn't what they meant. The word "dainty" is the equivalent to the Spanish word they kept saying, but I wasn't going to tell them that.

Quote of the Week

We read an article about "Developing Healthy Eating Habits," so naturally, that was the title of our Key Topic on our worksheet. The students had to finish the statement, "Developing Healthy Eating Habits is about..."

A Japanese student wrote, "...is about how to fix fat to healthy."

In her summary of the entire article, she wrote, "big (fat) is not healthy...eat less oil things."

*The article never said anything about being or becoming big or fat if you did not follow the Healthy Eating Habits. I thought that said a lot about her observations & perceptions.

The Digital Translator

This year I have been blessed with a very diverse group of kids from around the world. There are 4 different continents represented. :)

I have two Japanese students (a brother & sister pair) who each have digital translators that they use throughout the day in all of their classes. It is extremely useful for them!

Last week, in our tutoring session, the three of us began discussing how long it takes them to walk home. The sister said that it took their dad about 25 minutes to walk the route, while it usually takes them about 45 minutes to walk to school. She then explained that it's because her brother walks so slow.

FYI, the entire time we're talking about this, sister & I have our bags on our shoulders (ready to walk out of the room) & are waiting on the brother, who is now taking everything out of his backpack & putting it on the floor. He is looking for his other glove before he goes out into the cold weather that faces him on his bike ride home.

He finally chimed in & simply said, "Yes, I don't do things... Uh...hmmm...I don't....I don't know how to say..."

I kept trying to "help" him by saying, "fast? rapidly? quick?"

He reached into his backpack (which was close to empty at this point) for his translator, as his sister & I continued to figure out the word he was looking for. He scrambled to type out the word so he could show me what he was thinking. When he shows me the screen on the translator, I read the word "hastily."

I started laughing & said, "Yep, you're exactly right!! You don't do anything hastily!! That's a great word. Remember that one." ;)

Quote of the Week

MR is a good student, extremely respectful, & often says very quotable things. The other day he was working on science homework in my class, so I told him to put it away immediately. I reminded him, "Somewhere safe so you don't lose it!"

He replied, "Yes, ok, I'm going. I'm putting it away." I watch him as he folds the paper 2 or 3 times & begins to put it in his pocket.

"Whoa, whoa! Is that somewhere 'safe'?? In your pocket?!"

Manuel looked up at me & said, "Oh. Yes. Ms. S, I don't ... (softer tone) I don't pee on myself."

Quote of the Week

Student: Miss, can...? (Pause)

Me: Yes, sir? What can I help you with?

Student: (Pause) Naw, nevermind. I'm not even gonna tell you...because I know you're just gonna tell me that I can do it myself.

Me: Perfect.

"You Don't Know Frank Sinatra?"

Efren (4th year immigrant from MX) & Araceli (5th year immigrant from MX) are the only two students in 3B. They have been at Kealing for 3 years together; they work well together & are comfortable with each other.

Today, Efren mentioned Frank Sinatra when we were talking about memoirs. He asked Araceli if she knew who he was. She looked confused & said rather enthusiastically, "NO."

Efren freaked out & said, "What? I can't believe you don't know who he is. He's a CLASSIC. Like, he's from the As! Not the Bs or the Cs or the Ds or the Fs!! From the As...a classic." (Note: Efren is a 14 year old boy with a Mexican accent, which made this whole thing about Frank Sinatra that much more entertaining to listen to. He seems to constantly impress me with his cultural diversity. It's refreshing.)

Efren also made sure we knew he listens to Frank all the time on his 8 Track at home & he also has some of Sinatra's songs on his iPod. ;)

To: Iraq, From: Lebanon

I have an Iraqi student this year in my ESL class. She is a refugee who has been in the U.S. for 2 years. The past several days, I've learned so much about her life & I admire her so much.

Earlier this week, I told her I was cooking a Lebanese meal for a few friends & we talked about all the foods I was going to make. She recognized everything & said, "Oh! I know these foods, we have the same in my country." (I love that she says, "in my country..." all the time!)

In my small little mind I thought, "Oh, I wonder if they get to eat traditional middle eastern cuisine very often? Maybe they don't." (Not sure why I thought that. Probably because I wanted to think that.)

I had a brilliant idea! "I'll pack up some leftovers from my Lebanese dinner & bring them to school for her to take home for her & her father!!" :)

I came to school today excited to share my gift with FJ. Enjoy our conversation...

I asked, "How often do you & your dad get to eat chicken & rice (hashweh)?"
She said, "Oh! A lot. (smile)"
"Oh, really? That's great! What about grape leaves? Dolmas?"
"Yes, we eat those too!"
"WHAT?? Do you cook them yourselves?"
"Yes, my dad cooks a lot. He used to be a chef in Iraq. (smile)"
"Are you kidding me?!?! I don't want to give you the food I cooked!! Y'all are going to think it sucks! Do you even still want it?!" (We're both laughing at this point.)
"Yes! I think I want it. I want to try it."

What just happened? Well, you live. You learn. ;)